It was high summer, and I was on one of my paid dates – with a woman you understand. She had hired me as a walker through my usual agency. If she had had any idea of my proclivities she didn’t mention that she knew. She was German, and younger than my normal clients ,…
There was a different world beyond the heavy velvet curtains. A long, high-ceilinged empty corridor. The age of the building was more obvious – heavy flagstones on the floor, dimpled from four hundred years of heavy riding boots – and a musty smell of leather and a faint taste of metal in my mouth and,…
At almost every conceivable cultural touchpoint, women are seen through a straight, white, male prism. Every influential piece of media is guided by a male perspective, even famously empowering ones. This isn’t even a controversial view; we all know it. Sex & The City was adapted from the books by a man. 50 Shades is…
The impact of anxiety on sexuality, and vice versa, is by far the most prevalent concern amongst my clients. Anxiety about sex is an experience that pervades individuals and relationships regardless of gender, age, sexual orientation, or body type. Ironically, the relationship between stress and sexuality is a catch-22; research shows anxiety often interferes with…
Psst! You! Yes, you! Want to get in on a little secret? We thought so! Naturally, us human beings are all a little curious about knowing things that we shouldn’t. And when we have a dirty little secret that we wouldn’t dare share, we often bask in the pleasure with a smug look on our…
Masturbation is weird. There are a million reasons we do it, and then we do it for no reason at the same time. It’s just something we’re compelled to do, and the large majority of us have no problem giving in to that compulsion. But what if someone asks you why you do it? What…
Hi everyone! Dr. Zhana here for another monthly Q&A on LELO’s Instagram. Since it’s been hot lately, we’re gonna talk about self-pleasure in the heat, sex, vacation sex… and any seasonal sex-related things. Q: What is the difference between summer sex and other seasons? Excellent first question! The greatest difference, I think, is the fun…
As an ode to sexual wellness , LELO has created a new pleasure maker that’s dedicated to the journey. Orgasms aren’t about a race to the finish line, but enjoying your best pleasure on the journey. SILA is a clitoral massager that allows you to explore new ways to reach climax. It features a variety…
In 2020, the majority of Americans had to learn to live with a new reality… cannabis being legalised across the nation in waves. At the time of writing, in July 2020, it’s completely legal in 11 states and the District of Columbia, and legal for medical use in 28 more states. It seems pretty likely…
While no two couples are the same, there are a few tips and tricks that can definitely make a difference when it comes to having a stronger relationship. And according to Gary Chapman, a doctor of philosophy, counselor, and author, the key to having a lasting relationship is to know, and make use of, the…
Pleasure and luxury go hand in hand at LELO. It’s difficult, then, trying to convince people that pleasure is itself not a luxury. It’s essential. It’s painful, then, to see the results of the Today show in July which said that 46% of American women consider themselves sexually unsatisfied. It should be no real surprise.…
Mindfulness is the state of being conscious or aware of something. It’s the ability to actively live in the present moment, being able to accept and acknowledge one’s own feelings, thoughts, and body in such a way that it induces relaxation and creates awareness without being overwhelmed. And while this therapeutic technique is self-focused, it…
A smaller hand. My pupils dilated in a shot – and there she was in the candlelight. Smiling at me – a rather similar lop-sided grin to the one that he had given me in the office. Maybe he’d borrowed it off her. Her hand stroked down my chest and, without a how-do-you-do, made…
Love is a notoriously difficult concept to pin down. What is it? Is it real? Is it measurable? How do we express it? How does it manifest itself? Why does it hurt sometimes? At LELO, we think we have a pretty good grip on what love is, and how it feels. But there have been…
The Correspondent magazine ran an interesting story about asexuality the other day. It’s interesting because it exists. It does more than simply state that asexuality exists, but goes on to talk a little about what it’s actually like to live with. This is good, because it displays progress – albeit very small and slow progress…
I hadn’t expected her to be there. He didn’t mention it. When he invited me back for dinner, I saw the expression around his mouth – his full mouth – the half smile, the glance up and down my body, resting in a very obvious way on the front of my jeans, the way he…
Living a kinky life comes with some drawbacks. To understand the mentality of those of us who engage in BDSM or any other kind of fetishism , it’s important to consider the deeply rooted stigma and stereotypes that revolve around our sex lives. There’s a longstanding attitude that sex should never be pursued only for…
It’s time to diversify our masturbation and try something new—we hear you! Now, you can listen to us. Literally. Volonte now offers a collection of our best audio erotica and audio sex stories. What’s even better? All the stories were contributed from our readers. Grab your headphones, perhaps your favorite LELO toy, and read along…
Masturbation is the best thing we ever invented, and then we invented sex toys to make it even better. You’re welcome. Today, though, we’re going back to basics, and looking at a few things you can explore to make your masturbation even better than the best thing ever. Which is what it was before you…
It feels like something we knew already, doesn’t it? Like, it shouldn’t take a study for it to be confirmed. We all know. But anyway, as if we needed to be told, a new study indicates that lesbians have more orgasms than straight women. (But not as much as straight men. Obviously.) The study into…
Best known for her comedic sketches on YouTube and Facebook, writer and actress Laura Clery gave us the tea on her professional and personal journey to success. She discusses relatable stories that remind us that our most uncensored moments are part of remaining our authentic selves. Q: What’s your favorite social media platform and why?…
The last ten years has seen a significant spike in public interest in domination, submission, and BDSM . Most of our favorite TV Breakfast shows have featured bondage gear for chrissakes, so it’s safe to say our secret is out. However, while there may be a spike in folks suddenly interested in buying fluffy handcuffs…
The Devirs are ultimate #couplegoals. Maya and Yehuda are content creators who have found success through protraying relatable moments of partnership and parenthood in their comics. We sat down with them to talk business and business in the bedroom. Check out the behind-the-scenes video on the comic they did about their favorite LELO sex toy…
We generally have consensual sex for three reasons. First is procreative, which is sex for the purposes of reproduction. Second is relational, in which sex is used to secure and maintain relationships like marriage. That’s about bonding and societal, structural stability. The third is recreational. Recreational sex is where society starts to get a bit…
Only this much is certain: demisexuality is not the adoration of Demi Lovato. If you love her, chase your bliss, but it’s not a sexuality. Demisexuality is something else entirely, and we’re going to take a quick look at it today. The language of sex, sexuality, and gender is becoming more varied and more nuanced…
The Mediterranean diet is known for its connection to extended longevity, prevention of diseases and now potentially aphrodisiac properties. It’s based primarily in the consumption of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts, beans, herbs—and you guessed it, lots and lots of olive oil. What is it about this dietary fat that we can’t get enough of? …
There is no such thing as a normal sexual response. Everybody reacts differently, sexually speaking. There are as many different sexual responses as there are people on this big dumb planet. There is immeasurable variation in the way individual people enjoy and respond to sexual activity. Most sex that happens is, statistically, not very good.…
We often discuss the issue on this blog of dealing with a partner with a higher sex drive than you . But what if you are that partner? What advice is there for those of us who’s sexual appetite isn’t being fulfilled? LELO has compiled five tough-love tips to help cope with a higher level…
You may have been a bit confused the first time you saw an image of LELO Beads, but kegel balls and Ben Wa Balls have been used for centuries. Here are LELO’s favorites, all comfortable, effective and made for better sex. The Benefits of Beads There are two primary reasons why people use beads; 1.…
Approaching a lackluster love life happens, but it doesn’t mean it has to happen. If you’re finding yourself uninspired in the bedroom, test out these fun sex positions. They each provide a different twist on positions you may already be doing, which can open your eyes to experimenting for more pleasure. The Joyride How: What…
A shot to the heart and you’re too late, but a bullet to the clitoris makes for the best date. We’ve created a list of the best discreet vibrators of all time and each of them has their own unique twist. They’re perfect for those who prefer to hide their toys, need to take them…
Almost without exception, any woman who has had the misfortune to adventure onto the internet has seen a penis unsolicited. It’s just one of those things that is now part of our lives, that we have to tolerate or be socially excluded entirely, like Tik-Tok. Women are unhappy about this for two very obvious reasons.…
BAHAHAHAHAhhhahahaHAHhAHahaAHaHAHahha… *oh* *oh* HAHHAhahhahahahhahahahaha… *oh* *phew* Hahahah… hahaha… HAHAHAhahaha.. ha.. ha. Ha. That’s better. There’s something therapeutic about a good laugh, isn’t there? It’s the best medicine, so they say. But does it really work of what you need is some sexual healing? A sense of humor is sexy, and studies consistently report that funny…
There’s no doubt this past year has brought about unexpected change for everyone, even in the bedroom. Whether you’ve been cooped up with your partner and having sex out of boredom, or home alone testing out virtual masturbation, this pandemic brought along an opportunity that showed us that sexual wellness is an important part of…
When I was a grad student, longer ago than I can comfortably recall, I remember sitting in a lecture, at the back, diligently taking notes on modal verb morphology, and I happened to notice the guy sat in the row in front of me, and slightly below, was watching porn on his phone. It struck…
Our culture places huge importance on losing one’s virginity. For many, being a virgin is seen as being ‘uncool’ and this is a big reason why so many individuals feel the pressure, engage in sex for the first time, and sometimes regret it. But if we’ve caught you before you’ve officially swiped your v-card, that’s…
Heartbreak fucking sucks. It’s the worst. It feels like a sickness, like poison, like grief. Everything loses its importance, nothing matters anymore, it’s all pointless. We feel bad for feeling bad, and it doesn’t seem to end. Nothing about heartbreak is fair, we blame ourselves and those who hurt us, and everything is a cycle…
We have very complex mating strategies as a species. Research shows that a heterosexual woman will adapt their behavior and the way they dress depending on the kind of relationship they’re looking for. Whether it’s innate or it’s down to external, cultural pressures is an important consideration, but whatever the reason, straight women looking for…
In a previous article, we talked in general terms about the act and experience of sexual meditation , which is a key element of sexual mindfulness. In this article, we look in more detail at exactly how to do it, because once it’s learned, it can’t be unlearned, and it could will represent the gateway…
When we describe our sexual fantasies, we tend to share the details and dynamics, focusing on specific parts of the fantasy and using those to define them. When we explain a dream to someone, we do the same thing: we tell them the individual details of the dream, although that’s not really how we process…
Queer sex therapist Casey Tanner took over LELO’s Instagram live to offer some amazing feedback on all sorts of topics—communication, boundary setting, PTSD, fetishes and more. Check out what she had to say about your questions! How do our bodies’ physical responses to sex encourage and/or limit our verbal communication? Our bodies are constantly communicating…
Since the approval in 1998 of Viagra, you’d be forgiven for suspecting that erectile dysfunction is the most prevalent sexual issue for men. But that’s simply not the case. Premature ejaculation far outstrips erectile dysfunction as the most common problem for men, when it comes to sex. What Causes Premature Ejaculation? Premature ejaculation is here…
To the average person, at first glance a Ben Wa Ball or Kegel Ball may leave you with a lot of questions. There’s no need to scratch your head, the functionality and purpose of Ben Wa Balls is actually quite simple-they’re mini intimacy trainers . They can be used during foreplay, for orgasm strength training,…
Recently, the U.S. Supreme Court clarified that people can’t be fired for being gay or transgender according to the 1964 Civil Rights Act. It ruled that LGBT+ people are protected from employment discrimination in the US. To most of us, it is the craziness that this happened as late as 2020. While I guess this…
Women have had a hard time of things when it comes to cheating, culturally speaking. In most of the societies mentioned in the Old Testament, it is very literally carved in stone that a man can take many wives, but if any of them cheat on him, there is a list of punishments too horrendous…
Have you ever finished having sex and thought, “that wasn’t like the movies”? Movie sex is, of course, scripted. Those are actors. It’s rehearsed, and practiced, and staged, and orchestrated. Hollywood does a very poor job of portraying the reality of sex , and rarely feature the kind of everyday sexual mishaps we all experience,…
The Smithsonian is a fountainhead of fascination and wonder. But dig deep enough, and you’ll find that this venerable establishment is as obsessed with sex as the rest of us. Let’s take a look at some more things the Smithsonian taught me about sex in the natural world. Slug At First Sight The unassuming leopard…
According to a survey about sex toy ownership in the U.S., nearly 80% of women over the age of 18 own a sex toy. Vibrators are by far the most common toy to own (78%), followed by dildos (60%) and anal toys (16%). This guide will go over all of these categories for sex toys…
We make up all sorts of stuff about sex. Birds and bees, storks bringing babies, damn, sex is confusing as heck. Some of those little oddities hang around and gather lives of their own until it’s hard to remember a time when they didn’t exist. We’ve pulled together and debunked five of the stranger myths…
With nice weather always comes an opportunity for some wild mountain sex, so here is a little guide to safer and more enjoyable hiking sex. DO 1. Hit some less popular trails It goes without saying that less popular trails equal fewer distractions. The possibility of getting caught in the act can add a…