Experience pain during sex regularly can be a major obstacle to the happy development of a relationship. The anxiety of chronic pain can trigger avoidance behaviour, leading us to dodge activity that might lead to sex, like kissing, touching, or intimacy in general. Even going to bed at the same time can fall away due…
If you follow this blog, you likely have already seen the wonderful pieces on the vagina vs. the vulva and/or on the clitoris . But I want to talk more about female genital anatomy, or the whole hooha in the all-together – clitoris, vulva, vagina, and linked uterus -, and about how that anatomy corresponds…
Sex is complicated. I often wonder if we knew that there were consequences up front, would we ever even bother with it at all? Some consequences are obvious: pregnancy, STIs, that kind of thing. But there’s a larger group of less commonly discussed after-effects that can undermine our sexual wellness, and because we don’t discuss…
Sex is great for just about everything. It can even make your hair glossier. But it can be hard work, and good sex requires at least some level of physicality. Today, we look at five ways exercise can benefit your sex life. Get some. Positive Body Image That moment, when you catch a reflection of…
The social pressure to conform to conventional standards, and the sense of being different from the rest of the multitude, are sources of considerable amounts of stress for many of us. Whether it’s ethnicity, gender, sexual identity, or any combination of these things, those of us who are categorized us ‘minorities’ often feel that pressure…
Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) like Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro, and many others, are antidepressants that can help treat depression and anxiety. That’s good. They’re used by millions around the world, and they wouldn’t be prescribed if their effects weren’t generally positive. What’s more, the more they are used, the more they are studied, and the…
When we hear the word introvert, most of us imagine a person with robot-like social skills. Such extremes, however, are relatively rare, which is exactly what makes them extreme. In reality, there’s a continuous scale between absolute introversion and extroversion and almost all of us fall somewhere in between. Nevertheless, the fact that we gravitate…
A myth is a widely held but false belief. A vibrator is a motorised device used for sexual stimulation. Put them together, and you have a formula for trouble. Quite a lot of people believe some very strange things about sex toys, and when lots of people believe strange things, it rarely ends well. So…
Humans aren’t good at interpreting big numbers and large datasets. Our minds don’t compute large, diverse data sets on an individual basis. What we do, with everything, is group them together, and segment things, to make them easier to process on larger scales. We do it all the time, it’s how we’ve evolved to be…
Sexual relationships and intimacy are complicated. And when identity and sexual politics gets thrown into the mix, this can create an even more complex situation. Being communicative about a range of issues including sexual limits, identity politics, your STI and HIV status, and more can help create a safer and better sexual experience for all…
“Do not criticize autosexuality, it’s making love with someone you like,” Woody Allen (Annie Hall) Autosexual, in a nutshell, is when someone has sex with, and is sexually attracted, towards oneself. It’s a complex term, prompting a fair amount of questions and curiosities. For example: Does it entail a person thinking of themselves during self-love? …
Remember in school, when your trigonometry teacher would threaten you with, “Pay attention! You’re going to need this one day…”? Most of us never ended up dreading the day in our adult lives when trigonometry would pop out from behind some tree that was perfectly perpendicular to the ground. In fact, the only knowledge from…
After the unreal month dominated by the global pandemic, all of us are without a doubt craving for our lives to return to their normal state, but it is very likely the normal state of affairs will not be the same as before, and that includes our sex life. To begin with, the result depends…
Hi everyone, this is Dr. Zhana, professor of human sexuality in New York University and it’s time to answer some questions about sex and love in this very strange time of the Coronavirus pandemic and the life-saving requirements to physically distance from people. It’s a challenging time for pretty much everyone. It’s challenging for single…
Here in the western world, we generally only pursue three approaches to sexual health and sex therapy: psychological, education, and medication. The psychological approach emphasises counselling to improves the whole gamut of the relationship. Education seeks to correct sexual misconceptions and encourage whole-body sensuality. And the medical aspect tries to correct things like erectile dysfunction…
Fact: we’re having sex earlier and getting married older. That means there are more years between adolescence and commitment for most of us, leaving more time for sexual adventure and casual hook-ups. Like it or loathe it, that’s the way of the world we live in. We are a reckless and hedonistic generation, and the…
You might have seen the word ‘sapiosexual’ popping up on people’s dating profiles. Perhaps you’ve used it yourself in yours. It’s kinda trendy at the moment, so we want to take a little look under the hood at what’s going on. What is sapiosexuality, is it real, and why are we attracted to intelligence? There…
It’s kinda hard to #ComeTogether when we’re supposed to remain six feet apart. That’s why, this year, LELO is using Pride month to focus on the power of community! And, luckily for us, there are so many role models that have walked this path before us that we can learn from—regardless of our sexual orientation.…
We live in unprecedented times. We’re going through a seismic cultural shift, and when this wave of Covid-19 has passed, or become manageable, things will likely never be quite the same again. We’re in the contradictory position of trying to fix something together by staying apart. The coronavirus pandemic has resulted in most of us…
Female pleasure isn’t complicated, but it can be complex. Which is probably why there are so many Google searches about this topic. We reached out to one of our favorite psychologists, Dr. Zhana, to help us answer the most frequently asked questions surrounding female pleasure. What would you like to know about female pleasure? Hi…
Phthalates. Easy to understand, hard to spell. And Read. And say without spitting everywhere. If it helps, you can just drop the initial ph- when you’re saying it and everyone will still know what you mean. We’re not fussy about the word, we’re fussy about all that it entails. That’s because phthalates have been linked…
By now, most of us have been impacted in one way or another by the coronavirus, and the disease it causes, COVID-19. Either we’re working from home, we’re in isolation or quarantine, we know someone who’s had it, or we’ve had it, or a million other ways that this thing is reshaping society. With all…
It’s easy to assume that men and women think about sex differently. But is that really the case? As it turns out, no it’s not the case. Or at least, it’s not the full story. There are differences. For example, whether gay, bi, or straight, men tend to respond automatically to specific body parts they…
What do we really know about male ejaculation? Sure, we’ve heard the expression, “I’m gonna come!” in movies and TV shows, and perhaps we’ve even heard it in real life (or something more like “Are you on the pill?” before they let rip. We also know that there’s sperm in semen … you know, the…
This article was scientifically fact-checked by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz. Our lives are currently a contradiction of fears and anxieties like most of us have never experienced before. Fear about an invisible contagion that can be carried and transferred by strangers without their knowledge, and anxiety caused by having to isolate ourselves in…
We’re saturated by the thought that men are obsessed with how their penises are perceived. Penis jokes have entered our daily vocabularies. I only have to say ‘size matters’ and, by some magic process of osmosis, we all know I’m talking about dicks. One of the most popular articles on this very blog is about…
Taste is arguably the most intimate of the five senses. Think about it—on any given day, we see so many people, we hear so many people, we (unfortunately) smell so many people, and even touch multiple people. We are so constantly bombarded by these sensory interactions—the multitude of faces encountered, the tone of that lady…
This article was scientifically fact-checked by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz. Sarcasm aside, we invite everyone with female genitalia to take a sec and reevaluate their vocabulary when it comes to naming their bits. Even seemingly minor things such as names (although names are definitely not a small deal) deeply influence how the female…
While foreplay, dirty talk, fornication, and sensual toys are sexy, the spread of STI’s and HIV is not. So, without trying to be a boner killer, the use of condoms is a conversation that simply needs to be had. Why? Because with them, we can all enjoy near risk-free sex which is the ultimate goal…
It’s 2020 and how the world has changed! By now you are likely on some level of self-isolation, if not full-on “shelter-in-place” lockdown. Panic and doom dominate the headlines. Uncertainty rules. And the health news is focused on how to stave off the virus. But I’m here to share the good news. There is a…
Know the feeling when you have an itch in a hard-to-reach spot on your back, and you try everything within your power to relieve it? This involves rubbing the spot vigorously against a wall, grabbing a long stick of some sort, or even asking someone to help you out. And when you finally do rid…
The current situation is enough to make anyone go crazy. Whether you’re cooped up in your home, at work during these trying times, or have been affected personally with the CoronaVirus pandemic, it’s fair to say that almost everyone, worldwide, is feeling the pinch, devastation, and frustration. And for couples who have decided to self-isolate,…
The single biggest obstacle people face in the bedroom is being too much in their heads — because that’s what’s behind basically every other sexual issue. If you’re thinking or worrying during sex, this can lead to difficulty getting aroused, orgasming , and truly connecting with your partner. If this is an issue you’ve been…
I recently came across a kink known as somnophillia, or sleep kink. I’ve written extensively about all kinds of kinks in the past, there isn’t a lot left out there that shocks me. Or makes me feel uncomfortable. But this kink seemed different. Somnophillia is a kink for a sleeping partner, or for somebody having…
An increasing number of countries worldwide are under various states of lockdown and quarantine due to the COVID-19 virus, including all of the European Union and significant parts of the United States. But being in a state of lockdown is no reason to freak out – remember all those times you wished you had some…
For the past month, and for what is sure to be a few more, the world has been occupied with COVID-19 (coronavirus). From stocking absurd amounts of toilet paper to thinking up the best 20 second songs to wash your hands to, it has been an interesting mix of panic and amusement as we come…
For many of us introverts, the idea of ‘social distancing’ feels like a blessing in a very dangerous disguise. Our governments are advising us all to stay home, to avoid all unnecessary travel, and to keep a roughly two-meter gap between ourselves and others. That’s bad for our social lives, but what does that mean…
To the cynical among us, the common thinking around penises is that ‘if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all. But many owners of penises — men — know that every peen is different and unique in its own way: like snowflakes, with no two the same. Yes, the size and shape of a penis…
I’m 25 years old, and I grew up thinking there were two types of sexes: male and female. I didn’t learn about what being intersex was in high school, and I didn’t really learn about it in college either. At the time, I identified as a cisgendered woman (and still am) with a sexual preference…
It’s the time of year for runny noses, sniffles and coughs. If you’re feeling the effects of a cold or flu, you probably don’t feel much like getting intimate with a partner or practicing self-love while you’re in that state. However, if you’re like this author and believe that an orgasm a day keeps the…
Sex addiction comes with a plethora of negative connotations and preconceived notions. While essences of truth exist in stereotypes, the sex addict archetype of an international playboy with an ostentatious sports car and an icy aortic valve under his tailored suit is in the minority. We heard about sex addiction from a female perspective ,…
We’re midway through February, and you know what that means, right? National Condom Day, of course! What – did you think overpriced five-course meals and ugly heart-shaped jewelry were the only ways to celebrate February 14th? Not so, my amorous amigos and amigas. National Condom Day is a holiday that’s been alive and kicking since…
You’ll often find men and women cursing the opposite sex for one or other reason. “Men!” she may exclaim, after just having had her heart broken (and vice versa). And so, we continue to tell ourselves that men are from Mars and women are from Venus… two totally separate entities that are so indecipherable that…
If you hear ‘Sexual & Reproductive Health Day’ this February 12th and think ‘putting condoms on bananas’, then you might be exactly the people this holiday is for. While safer sex practices are absolutely something that needs to be covered before you start an active sex life, there are unique aspects of your sexual and…
The American novelist Erika Jong said this about porn: “After the first 10 minutes of a porno, I want to go home and screw. After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again.” That’s both a great witty little line, but it also describes our complex relationship with pornography. So it’s no wonder…
“What a cutie!” I commented when meeting my nephew for the first time. An adorable redhead who seemingly always smiled. “Poor child will probably get ripped to shreds when he starts school, though,” I said under my breath. “By the time this kid reaches school, being a redhead will probably be cool,” a family member…
There’s no doubt that some people suffer because of their sexual behaviour, and that they have sex in ways that are unhealthy and harmful to them or their friends and family (like spending all their income on sex workers, getting fired from their jobs for masturbating, or continually cheating on partners they promised monogamy to).…
It never fails to amaze me just how little we know about sex . I’ve written frequently about my frustration at the lack of empirical knowledge about the clitoris compared to the understanding of pretty much all of our other anatomy. Another thing we know little about is the difference, or similarity, between men and…
A recent survey showed that around two-thirds of women have faked an orgasm. I suspect the remaining third have faked an answer in a recent survey. That’s not fair, I’m kidding. But it’s safe to say the majority of women have faked an orgasm at some point in their life – or at least given…
Our bodies are weird and wonderful things, aren’t they? As wondrous as they are though, we’ve still got some questions and they’re especially about the male body. For instance, what makes you guys scratch your balls so often? Also, what the hell is a foreskin even for in the first place? This leads us to…