If you’re a “Sex and the City” fan, you’re familiar with the over-the-shoulder shot of our beloved Carrie Bradshaw sitting at her desk and typing those famous words “…and I couldn’t help but wonder…”. Well, please indulge my Carrie moment: as I contemplated writing this blog about sex toy talk anxiety, I couldn’t help but…
Sexual Health
“Love yourself first before getting into a relationship.” True?
We’ve all heard the expression you can’t love anyone else before you learn to love yourself. Is there actual truth to this? Is it meant to be literal, or is there any wiggle room? Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist John Kim rejects the idea at face value. He told Psychology Today magazine “Yes, if you…
What Causes Soreness After Sex?
It shouldn’t be so alarming to wake up with redness, chaffing, throbbing, or burning between the legs after a wild, passionate evening. Dyspareunia is the medical term for any genital pain experienced before, during, or after sex. But trust that it sounds scarier than it is and is probably no reason to panic; the causes…
Does Sex Have a Smell?
We’ve seen it mentioned in TV shows, movies, and in songs. Think Rihanna: “Sex in the air, I don’t care, I love the smell of it”. And possibly you’ve even experienced it for yourself… sex has a smell! Yes, indeed, sex can have a distinct smell, and it’s completely normal (as long as both partners…
Understanding Female Orgasmic Disorder
Female Orgasmic Disorder is a surprisingly common condition clinically defined as a persistent reduction or complete inability to experience orgasm. While worldwide statistics vary, around 16-18% of women report some form of Female Orgasmic Disorder, though in reality these statistics may be higher, as female sexual conditions are chronically underreported due to social stigma. According…
What Are the Sexual Benefits of Yogurt?
Did you know that eating yogurt has sexual benefits? Due to its nutrient density, probiotic content, and effects on metabolism, hormones, and mood, you could actually be enjoying a more satisfying sex life when you add this snack or meal into your diet. Let’s explore the many ways in which yogurt can enhance your life.…
Sex as a Coping Mechanism: Why It Happens and How to Find a Healthier Balance
This article was written by a a licensed psychotherapist. When life feels heavy, it’s natural to seek something that helps us cope. Balancing work, relationships, and the constant sociopolitical tension can leave us carrying stress, grief, anger, and fatigue. Finding ways to cope isn’t just important, it’s essential for survival and for finding moments of…
How Sex Affects Prostate Health
Sex has wide-ranging health benefits for men. For example, it can help to bolster men’s mental health by promoting stress relief, emotional connection, and better sleep. Likewise, sex is a form of exercise that can help men in optimizing cardiovascular function. In addition, sex can help men to maintain and improve their intimate health, which…
Why Do I Feel Nauseous After Sex? Causes & Tips
What are the common reasons for nausea after sex? They can be categorised into four different sections. Physical causes, reproductive and gynecological factors, emotional or psychological causes, or medical issues. After discussing some possible reasons for nausea after sex, we’ll provide you with some tips on how you could perhaps relieve nausea symptoms. But please…
Sexologist Valérie Tasso Decodes Desire in a New Book with LELO
”Desire doesn’t rush. It simmers slowly over time.” Valérie Tasso, sexologist, writer and LELO Ambassador In a time when sex is widely discussed but often misunderstood, acclaimed author, sexologist, and LELO ambassador in Spain, Valérie Tasso, invites us to rethink everything we know about desire. In partnership with LELO, her new book “Sexual Desire: Everything…
Sexual Wellness for Cancer Survivors
Surviving cancer is a major feat. However, cancer treatments like surgery and chemotherapy often lead to physical and psychological changes that can have far-reaching and long-lasting effects on people’s lives, including their intimate lives. For example, it is common for survivors to experience body image issues, problems with sexual function, loss of libido, and other…
Sex Therapy or Marriage Counseling: What’s the Difference?
Truthfully, there are a few ways you could answer this question. And that’s because in some cases, there’s a clear distinction between sex therapy and marriage counseling. However, in many situations, these two modalities are like songs that have found their way into a bangin’ mashup. Let’s first take a closer look at each specialty:…
What Women Need From their Partners During Perimenopause
So, everything’s moving along with the woman in your life. You’ve been together for a long time, and you know each other better than anyone else. You get how she deals with emotional issues, stress, illness, injury. And you know how to provide comfort to her during hard times. And then, out of the blue…something…
3 Things You Can Do Today to Improve Your Sex Life
You know what’s universal? As in, common to literally everyone? Well, when it comes to our sexuality, the answer is: absolutely nothing. That said, there are 3 things all of us can do – at any time – that will improve our sex lives. #1: Address Your Stress If you thought I was going to…
Sex With Bipolar Disorder: What You Should Know
For people with mental health disorders, sex and sexuality can come with a unique set of challenges. It’s possible to have good sex and healthy relationships if you have bipolar disorder, but there are tips to keep in mind when it comes to managing your sexuality. What Is Bipolar Disorder? Bipolar disorder, previously known as…
Porn and Your Sex Life: Helpful or Harmful?
Since time immemorial, the association between porn and men has been undeniable. Not all porn, and not all men, of course. But even individuals who frown upon it aren’t surprised by the connection. And since it’s more accessible and plentiful than ever before, it’s worth asking about both potential benefits and negative consequences. The right…
Penile Mondor’s Disease, Causes and Symptoms
Sexual health is the foundation for sexual pleasure, and there are a wide range of conditions that can impact someone’s sexual experience. That’s the case for people with Penile Mondor’s Disease (PMD), a rare genetic disorder that affects cis men and people who were assigned male at birth (AMAB). This disorder can impact not only…
What’s So Great About an Orgasm?
What’s so great about an orgasm? If you said that “reaching the pinnacle of ecstasy” is pretty damned great (or some variation on the theme), you’d be correct. Honestly, what more can one ask for? That said, researchers have determined that orgasms are actually great for a bunch of other assorted reasons. According to the…
How to handle performance anxiety
Ever felt the pressure to be amazing in bed? Whatever “amazing” means to you… Whether that means staying hard, or looking hot, or feeling like you have to be the best they’ve ever had – we’ve all been there. But I’m here to tell you: this is performance anxiety. And it will absolutely get in…
Senior Sex: How To Have Great Sex at Any Age
Due to societal and cultural norms, many people believe that once we get old, we stop having sex. Sexual pleasure, like many things in life, has no age. And while it’s true that with age, our preferences, sexual fantasies, and desires might change and shift, they don’t usually disappear entirely. So, let’s talk about senior…
Common Mistakes While Using Condoms
Despite condoms being one of the most popular and oldest forms of contraception, many people still make mistakes when using them. When used according to instructions, both “external” (or male) condoms and “internal” (or female) condoms are 95% effective in preventing unwanted pregnancy and STIs. But with common usage mistakes, the number is closer to…
DoxyPEP: The “Morning After” Pill for STIs
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), more than 1 million STIs are acquired every day across the globe – the majority being asymptomatic. This includes everything from human papillomavirus (HPV) to gonorrhea, to herpes simplex virus (HSV). Many STIs can be easily treated with antibiotics when caught early, but some can lead to long-term health…
Men vs. Women: Why and How Do We Experience Sexual Arousal?
This article was medically reviewed by Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a social psychologist, researcher and award-winning educator. For more information: Website | Publications | Instagram To count the number of emotional and physical feelings we experience within a day would be merely impossible. We can go from happy to anxious, horny to angry, and sleepy to…
How Sex Feels During Pregnancy
If you’re a expecting, you’re probably thinking a lot about how your life will change when baby arrives, including your sex life. You might be experiencing conflicting feelings about having sex, and even wonder whether sex will feel different during pregnancy. Research shows that, on average, people experience a decrease in sexual activity during pregnancy…
Is Your Sex Life Merely Chug Chug Chugging Along?
Are you sex-stuck? Yup, I just made that up. But please, feel free – make it a hashtag. You know you wanna. Here’s what I’m really asking: is your sex life yawn-inducing? Same ol’ same ol’? BOR-ING??!! Don’t worry – we’ve got you. If you’ve been in a long-term relationship, sex can be deprioritized for…
Can I Have Sex if I Have Heart Problems?
Not to start this out on a somber note, but cardiovascular disease is the leading cause of death globally. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), cardiovascular disease takes an estimated 17.9 million lives each year, the majority due to heart attacks and strokes. It’s hard to get an accurate number on how many people…
Is Micro-Cheating a Thing?
Have you heard the term “micro-cheating”? Maybe you think it’s just the latest in a long line of fabricated TikTok hashtags designed for easy click bate. But actually, micro-cheating refers to real life behaviors that can wreak havoc on relationships. While there isn’t one reigning definition of micro-cheating, most experts agree with what Psychology Today…
How Does Affection Affect Long-Term Relationships?
When a relationship is new, it’s filled with excitement, warmth and goodwill. Most people – even those who aren’t touchy feely – enjoy some type of physical connection that isn’t necessarily sexual. Holding hands, arms around one another, hugs, playing footsie – all of these behaviors signal “hey – I really want you in my…
The Role of the Cervix During Sex
The female anatomy has been widely understudied and misunderstood… until now that is. People with vaginas, or those assigned female at birth (AFAB), have probably been well aware of the power of the cervix for as long as humans have been around. But growing research in the field of sexual health, especially female anatomy, has…
Penis Perils: 8 Afflictions to Avoid!
This article was medically reviewed by Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a social psychologist, researcher and award-winning educator. For more information: Website | Publications | Instagram Sensitive souls might like to look away now – particularly if they have a penis. Thing is, there’s a reason some guys call it their ‘crown jewels’: their penis is precious,…
What Sex Therapy Actually Looks Like
Sex allows us to connect with our bodies and partners, experience deep pleasure, and create more joy in life. For many people, however, sex is far from straightforward. Luckily, there’s an industry of sexual and mental health professionals who are dedicated to helping people overcome sexual obstacles and get back on the path to pleasure. …
The Best Sex Toys for Menopausal Women
A lot of people talk about menopause and all the unpleasant side effects that come with it – hot flashes, mood swings, skin dryness, and sleep issues. But not enough people talk about how menopause might impact your sex life and, most importantly – what to do about it. Just because you reached a certain…
Hug a Prostate: Proper Care for Your Pleasure Gland
This article was medically reviewed by Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a social psychologist, researcher and award-winning educator. For more information: Website | Publications | Instagram From pegging to butt plugs to anal vibrators to milking, as well as fingering and (for some) even fisting, stimulating the prostate can be a source of so much sexual pleasure to…
Celebrating Pride & Diverse Relationships
Happy Pride! While I’m a firm believer in celebrating the LGBTQ2IA+ community each and every day of the year, I’ll gladly take a month of publicly acknowledging the contributions of queer individuals, of uplifting those who call for equality and kindness and love and for speaking out on behalf of those who can’t because their…
The New Menopause Movement
“Why is it so hard to find information about this?” my clients in peri/menopause ask me with earnest desperation. My usual retort? “Well, consider the fact 100 years ago, the average life expectancy for women was 60. So, the minute someone started to complain of hot flashes or night sweats, funerals were planned”. It’s not…
How Your Body Might React While Getting Off Birth Control
As incredible as birth control has been for women in the modern world, it’s still a medication with side effects. People may get off of birth control because they’re trying to conceive, experiencing unwanted side effects, or hoping to be more in tune with their bodies. The reasons someone gets off birth control are completely…
Finally, an OTC Birth Control Pill
Something happened in March of this year that should have happened a long time ago. The very first over-the-counter birth control pill approved by the FDA was made available without a prescription in pharmacies all across America. “Opill ”, a progestin-only tablet, has been around for decades, but it’s manufacturer, Perrigo, says it took 9…
How Does Toxic Masculinity Harm Men?
What is toxic masculinity? Before we even define the term, we need to know more about the second word than the first, more incendiary one. Masculinity can have lots of different meanings across individuals, families, cultures and societies. Merriam Webster says that masculinity is “the quality or nature of the male sex : the quality, state, or…
Do Thin Condoms Break Easier?
We love sex. Especially when done responsibly. Condoms are an essential sexual health tool for many people. Finding the right condom, however, can be a bit of a hassle. The right condom can make a huge difference in your pleasure and your sexual health. A good condom needs to have a lot going for it…
Can Sex During Pregnancy Harm My Baby?
One of the most common concerns couples have while pregnant is whether or not having sex during pregnancy is safe or if they should avoid any sexual activity completely. So, let’s answer some of the most common questions you might have about sex during pregnancy and whether or not it is safe. Pregnancy sex safety…
Arousal Non-Concordance, Explained
The human sexual response cycle is a complex phenomenon and is often more complicated than people make it out to be. It’s normal to think that certain signals mean someone is turned on, like men getting erections or women getting wet. That’s not always the case. You may have even experienced this yourself – have…
Do Condoms Cause UTIs?
Urinary tract infections (UTI) are a pain in the… well, urethra. Not only are they incredibly uncomfortable, but they can also potentially lead to bladder and kidney infections, not fun! Since the beginning of time, women have been told to pee after sex. While there’s little scientific evidence on whether this actually helps prevent UTIs,…
Mindfulness Really Can Improve Your Sex Life
Many people are under the impression that mindfulness exercises should be practiced in total silence. And while, sure, that’s ideal in some instances, the beauty of mindfulness is that you can depend on it no matter your environmental circumstances. Any mindfulness instructor will tell you that sometimes it’s more important to be present and grounded…
Educational Tool for Sexual Anxiety
Low body image and sexual performance anxiety are common, yet unlikely topics of discussion. And not talking about them only adds to these issues. If you experience sexual anxiety and have body image issues know that you’re not alone. Around 16% of women and 25% of men experience sexual performance anxiety. According to experts, around…
Does Squirting Stop After Menopause?
For women, menopause is just a part of life, but the end of your reproductive years certainly doesn’t mean the end of your sex life. Lots of things are changing during this new season of your life, but many things will stay the same. Luckily, the conversation on sex after menopause is gaining some momentum,…
Is HRT the End-All-Be-All?
Just a few short years ago, anyone with a uterus was hard-pressed to find accurate and evidence-based information on peri/menopause. And then, like pennies from heaven, it was all around us. Social media, talk shows, blogs, newspaper and magazine articles were finally giving us and our lived experiences the respect we deserved. While those of…
Spice It Up: It’s All About the Novelty
It’s inevitable – long-term partners are gonna get bored. Maybe it’s the conversation, your daily routine or the same old weekend plans. At some point, sex might also morph into a yawn-apalooza. Being with a long-term partner can mean a lifetime of love, connectedness, commitment and care. And contrary to popular belief, it can also…
Does Stress Affect Fertility?
It’s generally accepted by the medical community that chronic stress can lead to wide-ranging physical and behavioral health issues. When we experience any kind of upset, our nervous systems trigger the “fight-flight-freeze” response. That’s a protective function. But when it happens too frequently, and if we aren’t able to manage symptoms, we’re at increased risk…
Erectile Dysfunction in Younger Men Is Common. But Why?
Years ago, I was interviewed for an article on Erectile Dysfunction in young men. It was interesting to talk to a young female reporter who knew absolutely nothing about the subject. She sent me a long list of questions and we had several long discussions on the phone. I thought that this was a great…
Echoes from the Bedroom: The Curious Rise of Rabbit Vibrators
In the ever-evolving landscape of sexual wellness, one product has hopped its way into the spotlight, carving out a niche that continues to grow in both popularity and acceptance – the rabbit vibrator. Once a hushed secret, these devices are now celebrated for their role in fostering sexual exploration and well-being. The Historical Hop: From…