If someone has an orgasm during consensual sex, people generally assume that the sex must have been good. However, in a recent study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, researchers found that consensual sex can be bad even when orgasm occurs. They called these kinds of experiences “bad orgasm experiences.” More specifically, the study…
A third of Americans have lied to a significant other about their number of sexual partners, according to new research. A study of 2,000 Americans who’ve had sex revealed that of those who’ve fibbed their number (32%), 42% were men and 23% were women. Now that we know that a whopping third of us are…
When modern sex research began after World War II, many thought that “normal” sex was limited to married heterosexual vaginal intercourse—with everything else suspect or “perverted.” But over the past 70 years, as researchers have delved even deeper into sexuality, they’ve discovered that the loving, successful and mentally healthy population actually exhibits tremendous sexual diversity.…
Think about a time when you experienced a huge rush of positive and exciting emotions, like riding a roller coaster or finally standing up for yourself in an argument. These experiences often create an intense whirlwind of feelings that make us feel powerful, strong and almost invincible. But those feelings don’t last forever… Just like…
You know when you feel extremely close to your partner? Like after sex or whilst sharing a moment that enhances your bond and makes you feel even more in love or lust? Yeah, oxytocin plays a big role in facilitating that special bond. But its role doesn’t just stop there… What is Oxytocin? Oxytocin is…
If you’re a proud vulva owner, let me get a hallelujah! For starters, they’re freaking beautiful, aren’t they? And secondly, we’re continuously learning new ways to experience pleasure with this little sweet spot. Not only that, but having a vulva is basically a superpower on its own! Which is why LELO has revolutionized the game…
The more you use a vibrator and the stronger, does it eventually desensitize you? Do vibrators desensitize the clit? If I stimulate my clit with my toy too much can it cause any damage? Can a sex toy harm your private parts (ex. intense hard vibration on [the] clitoris)? Can you get addicted to us[ing]…
The clitoris has been misunderstood for a long time. Forever, really. Recently, a lot of research has emerged that has helped to explain the structure, function, and evolution of the clitoris, but you’d be surprised how even authoritative voices on the subject can still get it wrong, or be working to outdated information. We’ve come…
The impact of anxiety on sexuality, and vice versa, is by far the most prevalent concern amongst my clients. Anxiety about sex is an experience that pervades individuals and relationships regardless of gender, age, sexual orientation, or body type. Ironically, the relationship between stress and sexuality is a catch-22; research shows anxiety often interferes with…
In 2020, the majority of Americans had to learn to live with a new reality… cannabis being legalised across the nation in waves. At the time of writing, in July 2020, it’s completely legal in 11 states and the District of Columbia, and legal for medical use in 28 more states. It seems pretty likely…
Pleasure and luxury go hand in hand at LELO. It’s difficult, then, trying to convince people that pleasure is itself not a luxury. It’s essential. It’s painful, then, to see the results of the Today show in July which said that 46% of American women consider themselves sexually unsatisfied. It should be no real surprise.…
The Correspondent magazine ran an interesting story about asexuality the other day. It’s interesting because it exists. It does more than simply state that asexuality exists, but goes on to talk a little about what it’s actually like to live with. This is good, because it displays progress – albeit very small and slow progress…
Living a kinky life comes with some drawbacks. To understand the mentality of those of us who engage in BDSM or any other kind of fetishism , it’s important to consider the deeply rooted stigma and stereotypes that revolve around our sex lives. There’s a longstanding attitude that sex should never be pursued only for…
The last ten years has seen a significant spike in public interest in domination, submission, and BDSM . Most of our favorite TV Breakfast shows have featured bondage gear for chrissakes, so it’s safe to say our secret is out. However, while there may be a spike in folks suddenly interested in buying fluffy handcuffs…
Only this much is certain: demisexuality is not the adoration of Demi Lovato. If you love her, chase your bliss, but it’s not a sexuality. Demisexuality is something else entirely, and we’re going to take a quick look at it today. The language of sex, sexuality, and gender is becoming more varied and more nuanced…
The Mediterranean diet is known for its connection to extended longevity, prevention of diseases and now potentially aphrodisiac properties. It’s based primarily in the consumption of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts, beans, herbs—and you guessed it, lots and lots of olive oil. What is it about this dietary fat that we can’t get enough of? …
There is no such thing as a normal sexual response. Everybody reacts differently, sexually speaking. There are as many different sexual responses as there are people on this big dumb planet. There is immeasurable variation in the way individual people enjoy and respond to sexual activity. Most sex that happens is, statistically, not very good.…
There’s no doubt this past year has brought about unexpected change for everyone, even in the bedroom. Whether you’ve been cooped up with your partner and having sex out of boredom, or home alone testing out virtual masturbation, this pandemic brought along an opportunity that showed us that sexual wellness is an important part of…
Queer sex therapist Casey Tanner took over LELO’s Instagram live to offer some amazing feedback on all sorts of topics—communication, boundary setting, PTSD, fetishes and more. Check out what she had to say about your questions! How do our bodies’ physical responses to sex encourage and/or limit our verbal communication? Our bodies are constantly communicating…
Since the approval in 1998 of Viagra, you’d be forgiven for suspecting that erectile dysfunction is the most prevalent sexual issue for men. But that’s simply not the case. Premature ejaculation far outstrips erectile dysfunction as the most common problem for men, when it comes to sex. What Causes Premature Ejaculation? Premature ejaculation is here…
To the average person, at first glance a Ben Wa Ball or Kegel Ball may leave you with a lot of questions. There’s no need to scratch your head, the functionality and purpose of Ben Wa Balls is actually quite simple-they’re mini intimacy trainers . They can be used during foreplay, for orgasm strength training,…
Recently, the U.S. Supreme Court clarified that people can’t be fired for being gay or transgender according to the 1964 Civil Rights Act. It ruled that LGBT+ people are protected from employment discrimination in the US. To most of us, it is the craziness that this happened as late as 2020. While I guess this…
Got a dirty mind? Got sex on the brain? Good for you, Einstein, because new research indicates that frequent sex, and the desire for it, can have a significant influence on our cognitive ability. Over the last decade, a growing body of research into human and animal behavior has been published indicating that the more…
Erectile dysfunction affects around 20% of men over 20 years of age – that’s around 20 million people. But, in a recent survey of men suffering from ED, half of them couldn’t name a single risk factor that might potentially cause or contribute to it. Despite how common it is, we as a society have…
I remember a study in 2016 that implied that many young men, after a decade of high-speed internet access, were experiencing erectile dysfunction as a result of the overuse of pornography. The study was featured in Time magazine, which quoted a number of such young men who claimed they “quit pornography to have more sex”,…
We know what you think, but we’ll stop you right there – you’re only half correct. Let us show you how going topless this summer can do more for you than just get rid of your tan lines. Ah, cleavage – it brings us such joy… Most of the time. Aside from being a source…
Many of us worry about the way our sexual desire fades as a relationship progresses. We’re usually aware of the honeymoon effect, and we expect that the beginning of a new relationship will be sexier and more passionate than the later stages, but regardless, we still wonder if the dip in sex drive is normal.…
Afterglow. It’s that warm, contented feeling most of us experience after sex as we lie panting, and recovering our breath. It’s generally one of the best features of sex, promoting intimacy and strengthening romantic bonds. But not for everyone. For some, even after great sex, the post-sex glow is tainted with feelings of negativity, self-doubt…
Surrendering to the call of our innermost desires is the collective pulse of our humanity. Those moments when we lose ourselves in time with our partner’s tempo transports us beyond ourselves. But when penetration hurts, the transcendent potential of sex eludes you. In those moments, the body is a betrayal. Everyone else seems to lap…
According to the immortal bard Billy S., alcohol provokes the desire, but takes away the performance. Any guy reading this knows precisely what Shakespeare’s talking about – because we’ve all been there. Imbibing too much booze truly amps up your sexual desires, but when the time comes to do the deed, your overindulgence can leave…
Sex is hard to qualify. What makes it good? And what makes great sex better than good sex? How do we measure it? Is it the overall amount of pleasure? Or the level of physical excitement? Or is it the strength of the emotional connection? How about the intensity of the orgasm? Or the general…
Science is important. Sex is important. We gathered the most recent compilation of research on the compelling and magical topic of… orgasms. Orgasm Equality: Scientific Findings and Societal Implications Current Sexual Health Reports, January 2020 Findings Less than 20% of females can orgasm from vaginal penetration alone Factors that contribute to the orgasm gap include…
Experience pain during sex regularly can be a major obstacle to the happy development of a relationship. The anxiety of chronic pain can trigger avoidance behaviour, leading us to dodge activity that might lead to sex, like kissing, touching, or intimacy in general. Even going to bed at the same time can fall away due…
If you follow this blog, you likely have already seen the wonderful pieces on the vagina vs. the vulva and/or on the clitoris . But I want to talk more about female genital anatomy, or the whole hooha in the all-together – clitoris, vulva, vagina, and linked uterus -, and about how that anatomy corresponds…
Sex is complicated. I often wonder if we knew that there were consequences up front, would we ever even bother with it at all? Some consequences are obvious: pregnancy, STIs, that kind of thing. But there’s a larger group of less commonly discussed after-effects that can undermine our sexual wellness, and because we don’t discuss…
Sex is great for just about everything. It can even make your hair glossier. But it can be hard work, and good sex requires at least some level of physicality. Today, we look at five ways exercise can benefit your sex life. Get some. Positive Body Image That moment, when you catch a reflection of…
The social pressure to conform to conventional standards, and the sense of being different from the rest of the multitude, are sources of considerable amounts of stress for many of us. Whether it’s ethnicity, gender, sexual identity, or any combination of these things, those of us who are categorized us ‘minorities’ often feel that pressure…
Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) like Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro, and many others, are antidepressants that can help treat depression and anxiety. That’s good. They’re used by millions around the world, and they wouldn’t be prescribed if their effects weren’t generally positive. What’s more, the more they are used, the more they are studied, and the…
When we hear the word introvert, most of us imagine a person with robot-like social skills. Such extremes, however, are relatively rare, which is exactly what makes them extreme. In reality, there’s a continuous scale between absolute introversion and extroversion and almost all of us fall somewhere in between. Nevertheless, the fact that we gravitate…
A myth is a widely held but false belief. A vibrator is a motorised device used for sexual stimulation. Put them together, and you have a formula for trouble. Quite a lot of people believe some very strange things about sex toys, and when lots of people believe strange things, it rarely ends well. So…
Humans aren’t good at interpreting big numbers and large datasets. Our minds don’t compute large, diverse data sets on an individual basis. What we do, with everything, is group them together, and segment things, to make them easier to process on larger scales. We do it all the time, it’s how we’ve evolved to be…
Sexual relationships and intimacy are complicated. And when identity and sexual politics gets thrown into the mix, this can create an even more complex situation. Being communicative about a range of issues including sexual limits, identity politics, your STI and HIV status, and more can help create a safer and better sexual experience for all…
“Do not criticize autosexuality, it’s making love with someone you like,” Woody Allen (Annie Hall) Autosexual, in a nutshell, is when someone has sex with, and is sexually attracted, towards oneself. It’s a complex term, prompting a fair amount of questions and curiosities. For example: Does it entail a person thinking of themselves during self-love? …
Remember in school, when your trigonometry teacher would threaten you with, “Pay attention! You’re going to need this one day…”? Most of us never ended up dreading the day in our adult lives when trigonometry would pop out from behind some tree that was perfectly perpendicular to the ground. In fact, the only knowledge from…
After the unreal month dominated by the global pandemic, all of us are without a doubt craving for our lives to return to their normal state, but it is very likely the normal state of affairs will not be the same as before, and that includes our sex life. To begin with, the result depends…
Hi everyone, this is Dr. Zhana, professor of human sexuality in New York University and it’s time to answer some questions about sex and love in this very strange time of the Coronavirus pandemic and the life-saving requirements to physically distance from people. It’s a challenging time for pretty much everyone. It’s challenging for single…
Here in the western world, we generally only pursue three approaches to sexual health and sex therapy: psychological, education, and medication. The psychological approach emphasises counselling to improves the whole gamut of the relationship. Education seeks to correct sexual misconceptions and encourage whole-body sensuality. And the medical aspect tries to correct things like erectile dysfunction…
Fact: we’re having sex earlier and getting married older. That means there are more years between adolescence and commitment for most of us, leaving more time for sexual adventure and casual hook-ups. Like it or loathe it, that’s the way of the world we live in. We are a reckless and hedonistic generation, and the…
You might have seen the word ‘sapiosexual’ popping up on people’s dating profiles. Perhaps you’ve used it yourself in yours. It’s kinda trendy at the moment, so we want to take a little look under the hood at what’s going on. What is sapiosexuality, is it real, and why are we attracted to intelligence? There…
It’s kinda hard to #ComeTogether when we’re supposed to remain six feet apart. That’s why, this year, LELO is using Pride month to focus on the power of community! And, luckily for us, there are so many role models that have walked this path before us that we can learn from—regardless of our sexual orientation.…