It’s generally accepted by the medical community that chronic stress can lead to wide-ranging physical and behavioral health issues. When we experience any kind of upset, our nervous systems trigger the “fight-flight-freeze” response. That’s a protective function. But when it happens too frequently, and if we aren’t able to manage symptoms, we’re at increased risk…
Sexual Health
Erectile Dysfunction in Younger Men Is Common. But Why?
Years ago, I was interviewed for an article on Erectile Dysfunction in young men. It was interesting to talk to a young female reporter who knew absolutely nothing about the subject. She sent me a long list of questions and we had several long discussions on the phone. I thought that this was a great…
Echoes from the Bedroom: The Curious Rise of Rabbit Vibrators
In the ever-evolving landscape of sexual wellness, one product has hopped its way into the spotlight, carving out a niche that continues to grow in both popularity and acceptance – the rabbit vibrator. Once a hushed secret, these devices are now celebrated for their role in fostering sexual exploration and well-being. The Historical Hop: From…
How Open Should I Be with my Doctor?
It’s generally accepted among medical providers that the more information a patient shares, the better the care they can provide. There are very strong arguments for accurately answering everything a doctor asks you about your medical history and your current health and well-being. But what if there are details you don’t want to share because…
Should You Stalk Your Ex and Why is it So Addictive?
(Trigger Warning: while the word “stalk” appears in the blog below, please note that it’s being used in the non-menacing vernacular (as a synonym for “search”). The origin of the word means something entirely different – “stalking” in its original form is of serious nature and potentially dangerous. If you believe you are the victim…
Sharing Sex Toys With Your Partners: What’s Safe & What’s Not
Do you share sex toys with a partner? Owning and using sex toys is definitely popular – 52.5% of women and 44.8% of men have used sex toys at least once before. While sex toys used to be a thing to use only solo, more and more people are not shying away from using them…
So, When Do I Get My Pap Now?
It used to be so simple. You went to see your gynecologist once per year. Your breasts would be checked, you’d have the dreaded pelvic exam that included STI testing and the pap, and then you’d be on your merry way. Phew, check that off the list until next year! But in recent years, things…
Queer People Own More Sex Toys, Research Reveals
It’s no secret that the orgasm gap still exists to this day, especially in heterosexual relationships. While 95% of heterosexual men report having an orgasm during partnered sex, only 65% of heterosexual women report the same. The stats are a bit different when it comes to queer relationships. Studies show that gay men orgasm 89%…
How Does Sexual Arousal Change Across the Menstrual Cycle?
The menstrual cycle is divided into four phases—each of which are distinctly different. And during each phase, there are a lot of hormonal ups and downs, especially with the hormones estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone. Now these changes in hormones can bring about all sorts of moods, behaviors, cravings, energy or lack thereof, motivation, and more. …
Authentic- The Word of the Year
Bet you couldn’t avoid “Best Of” lists last month as the year came to a close. Professional critics, influencers, and amateur bloggers alike love to get in on it, giving their seals of approval to a wide swath of items such as books, movies, sports highlights, gifts for hard-to-please Aunt Edna, sex toys (maybe Aunt…
How Trauma Can Affect Your Relationship
If you’ve experienced trauma – whether as a child or an adult – and if you haven’t received the support you need in order to process it thoroughly, relationships can be tricky. Before we jump into the interpersonal, let’s get a sense of what trauma is. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Service Administration (SAMHSA)…
Sex in the Media: Explore or Ignore – “Naked Attraction”
You might think this British series is a spoof on other titles with similar names, but you would be wrong. “Naked Attraction ” is actually as literal as literal gets. Here’s the premise: a person looking for love (dressed – at least at first) gives the once-over to six fully nude people, each of whom…
Top 5 Foods for Men’s Peak Sexual Health
If your sexual health isn’t what you’d like it to be, your daily habits could be to blame. Things like tobacco, alcohol, and obesity will all decrease your fertility and negatively affect your sexual functioning. Fortunately, there are many simple things you can add to your lifestyle that will get you back on track toward…
Pregnancy Sex: What’s Okay and What’s Not
Congratulations! You’re embarking on a 9-month journey that is going to have its share of ups and downs, but doesn’t need to mean the end of ins and outs. During pregnancy, sex may be the furthest thing from your mind, or it may be the only thing you’re thinking about. Sex during pregnancy is totally…
Reduce Stress and Have Sex This Holiday Season
Let’s get right down to what you already know: the holiday season is upon us and that usually means a lot of added stress. The big headline? Stress and sex rarely mix. So, with all the travel and traffic and meal prep and gift lists and décor pressure and family pressure, etc., who can possibly…
Male Anatomy Explained
It’s a common myth that men think about sex every seven seconds. However, a study conducted at Ohio State University suggests the real number is likely closer to 19 times a day. Regardless of the figure, you can guarantee most of those thoughts concern getting busy between the sheets, and not what happens in the body. A…
All Lubed Up & Ready To Go: Why (and How) To Use Lube
This article was scientifically reviewed by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz. She is a professor, researcher, private practitioner and Fellow of the American Psychological Association. While the word ‘lube’ might conjure up memories of questionable frat-hosted wrestling events or comically over-sized tubs of jelly on a porn set, using lube is one of the best…
I Love to Laugh: A Meditation Guide
There are a lot of different types of meditations to choose from and one of them is Laughter Meditation. Laughing comes from deep inside us and there’s always a healthy supply. You may be self-conscious at first but laughing out loud, not texting it (lol), breaks up tension in the body as it relaxes the…
Why Children Need Sex Ed
Parenting would be a lot easier if it were like baking – exact ingredients, precise directions, specific chocolate-to-dough ratio, and voila! The perfect chocolate chip cookie! (Um, I mean, kid). While there’s literally no one specific recipe for raising children, a lot of parents incorporate informed decision-making in their approach. Choosing if, how, and when…
All Good in the Hood: 6 Things You Didn’t Know About the Clitoris
This article was scientifically reviewed by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz. She is a professor, researcher, private practitioner and Fellow of the American Psychological Association. 1. It’s More Than Meets the Eye A 3D model of the clitoris is just starting to make its rounds in Sex Ed. Classes, and honestly it’s about time. Everyone…
How is Andropause Diagnosed?
Andropause is similar to its female counterpart, menopause , and refers to declining levels of testosterone in aging men. Often referred to as Low T, this condition isn’t as widely understood as menopause, making it difficult for both patients and physicians to recognize. Fortunately, diagnostic tools for measuring testosterone levels are improving, making it easier…
Get That Laptop Off Your Uterus! …Right?
Last night, as I said goodnight to my almost-grown daughters, I noticed that each of their respective laptops rested directly on their respective laps. Hystero-Mamma kicked into high gear. “Girls – why aren’t you using pillows as a barrier between your computers and your ovaries? How many times do we have to review this? Don’t…
Are You Really More Horny on Your Period?
Do you ever find yourself extremely horny while on your period? If the answer is yes, know that you are definitely not the only one. And there are reasons why you might be feeling this way. Our sex drives are ever-changing and fluctuating, and there are a plethora of reasons, external and internal, that can…
Dear LELO: How Do I Tell My Partner I Have an STI?
This article was scientifically reviewed by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz. She is a professor, researcher, private practitioner and Fellow of the American Psychological Association. Dear LELO, Help! After an abnormal Pap smear, I was referred for a colposcopy… and have been told I have HPV. I have no idea who I got this from…
Pelvic Floor Exercise: Why & How To Tone Kegels
This article was scientifically reviewed by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz. She is a professor, researcher, private practitioner and Fellow of the American Psychological Association. With all the lifting, stretching, running and sweating so many of us do at the gym however many times a week, we’re here to tell you about one muscle set…
Psycho-Emotional Symptoms of Menopause
Search for a numbered list of menopause symptoms on the web and you’ll find that there’s no one definitive inventory. One site says there are 34, another one says 66 – the cataloging varies widely. Since menopause research is relatively new and medical training for treatment is practically non-existent – and because each woman’s experience…
How the Birth Control Pill Works
The invention of the birth control pill was a revolutionary event that completely changed the sex lives of cis-gendered women around the world. It finally allowed them to take control over their reproductive system, and be in charge of their sexuality a little bit more. However, while it’s a super popular contraceptive method that many…
Is Porn Cheating?
How do you feel about porn? Now, how do you feel about someone consuming porn while in a committed relationship? Porn is one of those things that can be quite variable depending on the individuals involved, communication between those individuals, past behavior, and current relationship conditions – even the type of porn can be a…
It’s Time to Masturbate More (and Better)
Whether it’s exercising more, eating more sustainably, or saving money, we all want to improve our lives, but it can be a daunting task. Here is the perfect advice if you’re looking to get your life back into gear. Masturbate more. Yup, you heard me. You should be masturbating more! Masturbation, and orgasms, have a…
Sex in the Media: Are You There, God? I Just Found the Holy Grail!
When I was growing up – before the internet got its greedy little hands on us – we had books and tv and movies and music. If we were lucky, we had parents who had healthy views on sex and welcomed the inevitable questions of burgeoning adolescents. While I was one such fortunate kid (and…
Why Aren’t You Taking Your Medications?
I went to a very progressive medical school, and one of the principles I learned was that it is not good enough to make the diagnosis and prescribe the right medications. You have to remove as many obstacles as possible that may be interfering with your patients taking the drug. The most prevalent obstacles tend…
Self-Insemination – A Natural Pregnancy Hack
Have you heard of Self-Insemination? Self-Insemination is a process where a man will ejaculate at home into a cup and use that sample to draw it up with a syringe to insert into his partner. Whenever it comes out, it’s clumpy and goopy. And then basically there are enzymes that break it up. So, he…
How To Have The Best O
We realize that it’s one thing to know all about the orgasm, and quite another to experience one. Whether you’ve never had one, or want to improve the ones you already enjoy, we’ve got you covered. Here are some simple steps to start exploration: 1. Above all else, fly solo and explore. Whether you’re looking…
Pilates Benefits for Sex: Can Pilates Improve Your Sex Life?
Pilates benefits for body, mind, and soul are known by many. From improved posture to less stress, Pilates seems to be the form of exercise that’s all the rage these days. But how about Pilates benefits for sex? Science says that Pilates might be one of the most effective workouts to improve your sexual health…
What Is the Purpose of a Pap Smear Test?
Navigating your healthcare with autonomy and empowerment means knowing what your options are and what the purpose is of different procedures. One test that is commonly recommended for people cis-women and people with vaginas is the pap smear. Pap smears are an essential part of reproductive health care, giving providers vital information about your cervical…
Best Foods to Support Your Sex Life
When it comes to sexual performance, no food will magically boost it on its own, but some can go a long way working in synergy with other efforts, helping you be your best, healthiest and sexiest self. Hormone Balancing Foods With the increasing amounts of hormone disrupting toxins in the environment and lifestyle problems like…
Pride…All Year Long.
If you’re a member or an ally of the queer community, you know that Pride isn’t just one month of celebration. Being proud of who you are as an individual and as a sexual being (or not – that’s the “A” for asexual in LBGTQIA+) is something we strive to experience every day. But since…
Introducing SHIP: Sexual Health and Integrative Pleasure Model
A lot of the research on sexual health has historically focused on dysfunction and disorders like erectile dysfunction and anorgasmia. While this type of research is necessary, it doesn’t tell the whole story. Focusing solely on dysfunction misses the idea that humans are complex creatures with endless factors that influence how we engage with our…
Intimacy Shouldn’t Hurt
Intercourse should not hurt. I’m always surprised at how many of my patients have been suffering with painful intercourse of some kind for years. But I’m also so glad they have finally decided to seek treatment. There are many reasons why a woman might be suffering from painful intercourse. For example, lack of lubrication, vaginal…
What Is High-Risk Sexual Behavior?
Sex is a beautiful part of most people’s lives and relationships. Unfortunately it also comes with its own difficulties and details to navigate. Certain sexual behaviors and habits are inherently risky, that’s a part of life. Understanding these potential risks, why people engage in them, and how to avoid them is an important step in…
All About PrEP: Are You a Good Candidate?
The first reported cases of HIV were diagnosed in 1981. This devastating epidemic disproportionately affected the LBGTQ+ community and places throughout the world that have limited access to sexual education and healthcare. Since then it has continued to be a major public health concern throughout the world. Approximately 84.2 million people have been infected with…
Emotional Blocks in Sexual Pleasure
You’re really into a new romantic or sexual partner. They make you feel lit up, seen, supported, and you also happen to think they’re super cute. You start to kiss and it feels right, you feel arousal building, everything feels hot and sexy, but then you just seem to… tap out. You like them, you’re…
WAP: The Problematic History of Vaginal Wetness
In the words of the great Cardi B “Now get a bucket and a mop, that’s some wet ass pussy”. Vaginas get wet. It’s one of the many wonderful things they do. If you have a vagina, I hope you embrace its wetness. If you don’t, we understand. People with vaginas have been told to…
Should You Be Able to Get a Prescription for Vibrators?
Using a vibrator can help you amp up your sex life whether it’s during masturbation or with a partner. But it isn’t all fun and games. Vibrators also have therapeutic applications and can help with various medical conditions. That begs the question – should you be able to get a prescription for a vibrator? The…
What Is a Tilted Uterus? And How Does It Affect Sex?
A tilted uterus, sometimes known as a “tipped” uterus or a “retroverted” uterus, can be a common condition that happens to nearly one in every three women. Even so, many of those who have a tilted uterus can go their entire lives without knowing it. But, for those who experience discomfort due to a tilted…
So You’re Thinking About Getting a Vasectomy
Considering this procedure? Then you’re in very good company. In fact, it’s becoming more and more commonplace, particularly here in the United States. While it can bring to mind words such as impossibly painful and very permanent, these are old school characterizations. Urologist Justin K. Houman of Cedar-Sinai Hospital in Los Angeles gets it. “Because…
Vagina Tales: Myths About the Hymen
If you’re a fan of historical fiction you’ve probably seen many scenes in books, movies, or shows of aristocratic families making a big deal of someone’s first time having sex after getting married. They check the sheets for blood the next day, they may even have a “doctor” examine the woman to ensure her “purity”.…
10 Sexual Orientations You Probably Haven’t Heard Of
Variety is the spice of life, and what’s more human than the primal urges and desires that drive you to connect with other humans? We’re talking about the complex and colorful world of sexuality. You’ve probably got the basics down – straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, and queer, but there is so much more to sexuality…
Sex in the Media: Explore or Ignore – “Fleischman is in Trouble”
If you haven’t caught this delightful FX-Hulu series yet, I highly recommend you do so. I’ve only seen the first episode, but I can’t wait to devour the rest of the season. “Fleischman is in Trouble” is based on the much-heralded 2019 book by Taffy Brodesser-Akner, and while I expected terrific performances by the likes…
You’re Hot and…You’re Not.
Why do we find particular people attractive? Is it merely pheromones? Is it about what’s normalized for us culturally? And what does science say about all of this? A 2019 study published in The Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America revealed that yes, we actually do have types.…