Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 26 Oct 2018 19:19:37 +0000 View Original Article The talk. The birds and the bees. The awkward conversation with your parents you dreaded as a child. It probably went something like this: “Well, when two people love each other very much…” followed by a vague description…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 17 Oct 2018 00:30:55 +0000 View Original Article I watched as she stormed into the house. Peril, sheer peril, if you let her tell it. She hadn’t noticed me reading, quietly in the corner, so she went about, slamming cabinets and drawers, then finally ending her…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 10 Oct 2018 16:52:53 +0000 View Original Article I recently read a statistic that the average couple spends between 200 and 300 hours planning their wedding. A few of those hours likely go into writing wedding vows. How many of us revisit or even think about…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 03 Oct 2018 16:10:54 +0000 View Original Article In an interview, John Gottman was once asked what to do about “insatiable jealousy” in relationships. His response hit on something really profound for me. I believe that every person has areas of enduring vulnerability. For a marriage…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 25 Sep 2018 16:21:42 +0000 View Original Article Charlie was in my office yesterday. He was all smiles. I commended him on the quick transformation he had made in his relationship with his wife, Melinda. Even though his job had been extremely stressful lately, and he…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 26 Sep 2018 14:50:22 +0000 View Original Article A few months ago I posted a personal picture on LinkedIn, and something happened. Professionals wanted to talk about it. Here it is. To be clear, physically attending a school play wasn’t the breakthrough here. What I was…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 19 Sep 2018 15:29:18 +0000 View Original Article It’s a given: parenting is hard work. But when you’re raising a child with special needs, the level of care and stress is not just higher—it shifts the foundations of families and adds unimaginable complexities for everyone involved.…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 31 Aug 2018 19:19:58 +0000 View Original Article During my training to become a Marriage and Family Therapist, I set out to find software that was flexible enough for my unique needs as a therapist while still keeping me in control of important tasks like client…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 05 Sep 2018 17:42:40 +0000 View Original Article In October 2012, my business partner Alysha Roll and I travelled to Seattle for Level 3 Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy. We were so excited to learn from the Gottmans in person and the experience did not…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 30 Aug 2018 00:13:31 +0000 View Original Article As much as we both dislike conflict, we seem to have an uncanny ability to get into fights at the most inconvenient times. Take, for example, the fight about money we started minutes before a group of friends…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 21 Aug 2018 20:45:29 +0000 View Original Article Illustrations by my daughter, Madeleine Siegel Science illuminates the ways in which cultivating the capacity to be aware enhances our health and relationships with one another. I’d like to invite you to reflect on a number of foundational…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 15 Aug 2018 19:10:00 +0000 View Original Article Do you stand over your child’s shoulder when they do their homework? Do you find yourself directing your kids’ every move? “Pick up this, clean up that, sit up straight, finish your homework, study hard, say thank you.”…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 08 Aug 2018 18:42:05 +0000 View Original Article In the foreword to my book, Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, famed researcher on emotional intelligence, Daniel Goleman, writes: These are hard times for children, and so for parents. There has been a sea change in the nature of childhood…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 01 Aug 2018 21:28:07 +0000 View Original Article Richard Williams, also known as Prince EA, is a filmmaker, activist, and public speaker known for inspiring his audience in the direction of compassion and love. He recently created a beautiful video based on some of our core…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 26 Jul 2018 18:38:16 +0000 View Original Article Intimacy is the glue that holds families together. It’s what connects us over the years and across the miles. It’s what gets us through the hard times, and what makes the good times even better. It’s the grease…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 19 Jul 2018 20:03:59 +0000 View Original Article Leadership skills are, in many contexts—the workplace, schools and classrooms, politics, volunteer organizations, and even within families—fairly recognizable. People who take initiative, who have a vision, and who can strategize, plan, and accomplish goals to achieve their vision…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 11 Jul 2018 20:03:01 +0000 View Original Article This article originally appeared in The Washington Post, co-authored by Christopher Dollard and John Gottman. Marriage is one of the oldest social, economic, religious and legal institutions in the world, and there’s no shortage of opinions on what makes…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 02 Jan 2018 18:01:52 +0000 View Original Article It’s that time of year again, when many of us make New Year’s resolutions that we have the best intentions of keeping. But despite our initial efforts, we often don’t follow through. A lot of us fail…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 13 Jul 2018 21:00:31 +0000 View Original Article Parenting is often described as one of the best and most stressful jobs that a person can take on. Becoming a parent is an incredible responsibility that comes with a new set of rules, and the need to…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 06 Jul 2018 21:38:52 +0000 View Original Article We like to put numbers on things. Like IQ. Or SAT scores. Or, if you’re into baseball, like I am, batting averages and ERA. John and Julie Gottman created theories and a whole modality of couples therapy based…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 03 Jul 2018 18:55:21 +0000 View Original Article With a shift in personal goals, values, and roles that differs greatly from previous generations, more and more millennials — those born from 1981 to 1996 — are tapping the brakes on marriage. Led by their desire to…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 26 Jun 2018 17:55:12 +0000 View Original Article Every year, in the U.S. alone, approximately 1.5 million people enter into a marriage where one or both parties have previously wed. Unfortunately, most of these marriages will fail. According to available census data, the divorce rate for…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 28 Jun 2018 20:18:20 +0000 View Original Article You know the times in life when things just don’t feel good? When you see one of those uplifting t-shirts that says, “Life is Good,” and you think, “Not mine, today is hard and I don’t like it.”…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 22 Jun 2018 16:50:50 +0000 View Original Article The year is 1969, and the patrons of a Greenwich Village neighborhood bar, The Stonewall Inn, have had enough harassment and corruption at the hands of law enforcement. The mafia-owned bar was a safe place, of sorts. Same-sex…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 19 Jun 2018 22:25:12 +0000 View Original Article Some relationships won’t work out. It’s not a nice thing to think about—that a relationship may have reached its expiration date—but it’s a reality. Sometimes, our mission at The Gottman Institute to create and maintain greater love in…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 14 Jun 2018 17:45:13 +0000 View Original Article June marks the worldwide celebration of LGBTQ Pride. Cities across the world organize parades and demonstrations to raise the visibility of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and other members of the queer community. Pride can be a moving experience…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 12 Jun 2018 17:18:13 +0000 View Original Article About a month ago I realized something had to change. I was too tied to my phone. Too distracted. Too stressed out. And missing important moments in my time with my family. So I put my phone away…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 31 May 2018 21:43:43 +0000 View Original Article You’ve probably done this before. You come home from a long day at work, and nothing sounds better to you than a nice back scratch. You snuggle up to your partner so that their hands are placed perfectly…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 21 May 2018 22:32:44 +0000 View Original Article A few weekends ago, I woke up with a nasty migraine. I knew it the second my eyes opened on that Saturday morning—the imaginary ice pick that has plagued me my entire life was back in its usual…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 18 May 2018 18:14:42 +0000 View Original Article Unless you don’t go on the internet or watch the news, then you know that the Royal Wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle is this weekend. Between radio, television, and social media, Harper’s Bazaar is estimating that…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 17 May 2018 20:55:24 +0000 View Original Article There’s a common misconception about relationships, and it starts with the words happily ever after that we hear in Disney movies as children. We’re told that it’s easy to simply settle down with a partner, or even find…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 09 May 2018 20:56:44 +0000 View Original Article We all know that having a new baby presents unique challenges, and research shows that couples are more likely to feel dissatisfied with their relationship after a child is born. As much as expecting parents plan and prepare,…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 11 May 2018 17:32:15 +0000 View Original Article Dr. Robert Navarra is a Master Certified Gottman Therapist, Trainer, Consultant, Speaker, and Certified as a Master Addiction Counselor. Dr. Navarra developed the Couple Recovery Development Approach, a relational model of addiction assessment and treatment based on his research. He designed the Roadmap…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 07 May 2018 22:17:58 +0000 View Original Article What’s the point of marriage? No, really, this is a serious question. What’s the point? If you don’t have a goal, objective, or specific outcome in mind, or if you don’t know what you and your partner’s needs…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 04 May 2018 17:51:40 +0000 View Original Article In our marriage, David is the more independent one. Even as a child, one of his most common refrains when anyone tried to help with something was “I’ll do it myself!” That served him well in becoming a…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 30 Apr 2018 19:44:13 +0000 View Original Article Children, just like adults, benefit greatly from consistent and deliberate self-care activities. Even if they are not currently stressed or upset, teaching kids to regularly take care of themselves will help ensure that they have the skills to…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 27 Apr 2018 17:43:28 +0000 View Original Article Cultural debate and discourse about consent have gained traction following the #MeToo movement. After years of silence, women are sharing their stories about sexual misconduct and assault. However, in the United States, a country that doesn’t teach comprehensive…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 25 Apr 2018 18:20:37 +0000 View Original Article Sexual assault is a sadly common experience for women. Nearly 1 in 5 women in the US are raped in their lifetime and their attackers are almost always men. This kind of violence can leave a woman deeply…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 23 Apr 2018 16:13:53 +0000 View Original Article Tony Robbins, motivational speaker and self-help guru, made some controversial statements about victims of sexual violence when he addressed the #MeToo movement at a recent event in San Jose, California. He stated that victims who speak up in…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 18 Apr 2018 16:12:44 +0000 View Original Article I was reading an article about the challenges of overcommitted organizations, and I had to chuckle a little bit when the authors lamented the challenges of sharing team members with two or three other projects, given that my…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 16 Apr 2018 17:29:00 +0000 View Original Article We will grieve forever because we love forever. There is no end to our love for our child,therefore there is no end to our grief… We will never get over it.– Angela Miller, A Bed for My Heart…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 13 Apr 2018 16:41:08 +0000 View Original Article Some years ago, when I waited tables for a living and before I worked at The Gottman Institute, I had a manager that I just couldn’t get along with. I constantly felt pressured like I wasn’t doing my…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 11 Apr 2018 20:15:40 +0000 View Original Article Julie Gottman, Ph.D. is the co-founder and President of The Gottman Institute, and Clinical Supervisor for the Couples Together Against Violence study. A highly respected clinical psychologist, she is sought internationally by media and organizations as an expert…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 06 Apr 2018 18:04:02 +0000 View Original Article Treatment plans are central to psychotherapy, but the way in which they are regularly created and utilized can pose ethical problems. The treatment plan is a document created by the therapist and client that identifies the client’s presenting…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Wed, 04 Apr 2018 17:50:56 +0000 View Original Article “What’s Love Got To Do With It” isn’t just a Tina Turner hit from the ‘80s. It’s also the paraphrase of a question that has shaped the direction of research into addiction and emerging approaches to treating the…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 02 Apr 2018 16:31:44 +0000 View Original Article Written by Heather Marcoux Whether you’re booking flights and hotels for a family getaway, or just punching in your credit card number to reserve a spot in a campground a couple of states over, the cost of vacation plans…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Fri, 30 Mar 2018 20:04:07 +0000 View Original Article Co-authored by Drs. John and Julie GottmanQuestions and curiosity form the basis of Judaism, and as we’ve discovered through our research on couples, the foundation of lasting romantic relationships. Jewish families all over the world will gather around…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Mon, 26 Mar 2018 22:14:54 +0000 View Original Article After the recent school shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida, teenagers are rising and making their voices heard, culminating so far with the March for Our Lives rally on Sunday, March 25 in Washington,…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Thu, 22 Mar 2018 17:01:08 +0000 View Original Article I am the child of not one, but two anxious parents and anxiety runs deep in the roots of our family tree. From my earliest memory until I hit my thirties, I was largely unconscious of this awkward…
Intimate Tickles Thought You Might Be Interested Published: Tue, 20 Mar 2018 17:36:40 +0000 View Original Article If you are newly engaged, congratulations! It is such an exciting time, but it can be stressful as you plan for your deepest commitment. For years, I’ve been a relationship counselor and have had the opportunity to see…