You may be a chatterbox in person but when it comes to knowing how to keep a text conversation going, a doorknob is more exciting. Here are ways to improve!
There are some people I literally cringe at when I see their name pop up on my phone. Oh god, not them again. Now, why would I say that? Sure, I may generally find them annoying, but in all honesty, they’re terrible at knowing how to keep a text conversation going.
How can a conversation progress when you ask me, “what’s up?” or say “I’m bored.” Like, come on people, I’d rather watch paint dry. Now, they could be brilliant conversationalists in person, but to be honest, I don’t want to waste my time to find out. [Read: 40 questions to ask your crush to subtly flirt with them]
How to keep a text conversation going
That’s the thing. If we go on first impressions, you want your conversation on text message to be solid. If your goal is to get this person to ask you out or you to ask them out, make sure that you excite them and create curiosity about seeing you.
Now, if you only say one word answers or ask job interview questions, you’re not going to get as far as you think. In fact, if you get a date out of it, even I’ll be surprised. Keep the text conversation going with these easy-to-do tips!
#1 Relax. Listen, when nervous or tense, we say stupid things or act like someone we’re actually not. You don’t want that, you want the opposite. You want this person to see who you actually are.
So, if this means you take a couple minutes to think of a reply or put your phone away and just take a breath, then do it. It’s a text, not a wedding proposal—if you get what I mean. [Read: Ditch your nerves and guide your mind]
#2 Make sure it goes both ways. People like to talk about themselves. It’s always me, me, me, me, me. Now, this isn’t a bad thing. In fact, if you’re nervous, ask a question and let them ramble on gives you some time to relax. Plus, you find out a lot about them. But, you want to make sure you limit the number of things you say about yourself. Yes, talk about yourself, but don’t make it all about you. [Read: Do you love talking and hate listening?]
#3 Be yourself. If you’re used to texting sarcastically, then that’s your style and you shouldn’t change it. This person will learn and get used to the way you text if they like you. Though, I do want to tell you to write with proper words, don’t text like you’re in grade eight. I mean, “brb” and “lol” are outdated.
#4 Know when to pull out. If you feel the conversation is dying, end it. Just end it before the flame goes out. This doesn’t mean you lost your chance with this person, this just means the conversation ended. Tell them you should get to work or that you have something to do. Then, text them later. But, if you end the conversation, let them know instead of just disappearing. [Read: How to not be a boring texter and keep anyone interested]
#5 Bring up details from past conversations. If they spoke to you about the shirt they bought yesterday or the exam they had last week, ask them how it went or how the new shirt looks. I know it doesn’t sound like a big deal but it is. You remembered a small and somewhat insignificant detail about them. But that detail shows you pay attention, and it keeps them interested.
#6 Be light. Isn’t life hard enough as it is? If you want to keep the conversation going, give them a reason to stay in it. So, if they feel good talking to you, they want to continue the conversation. If you make them feel bad, they’ll pull out. It’s that simple. People stick to things that make them feel happy. [Read: 20 flirty ways to text your crush and get them interested]
#7 Don’t multi-text them. Sending twenty texts messages in a row isn’t cute, like really, it’s not cute. If anything, it looks needy and that’s a huge red flag for most people. If you send a text, send one or two in a row and leave them the opportunity to reply. If you want to keep the conversation going, it needs to be a two-way street.
#8 Be patient. People work, they go to school, they have friends and family, so if they don’t message you right away, don’t assume they’re not interested in you. Instead, be cool. They’ll reply to you, don’t worry. And if they don’t reply, well, then you found out that they’re not the one for you. So, either way, it works out.
#9 Use memes. I never thought I’d say this but memes are actually a great way to build a connection and keep the conversation going. Memes are light and meant to make people laugh. If you want them to giggle, send them a meme you find funny and see how they react. Maybe they’ll send you one back. It’s a good way to just talk without a reason. [Read: Text conversation starters for the shy and socially awkward]
#10 Be flirty. If you’re wondering how to keep a text conversation going, throw in some playful and flirty texts here and there. If you received a flirty text before then you know how exciting it is to reply back. It’s fun, light, and you build the sexual chemistry. You don’t have to go all R rated, but cute and innocent texts never hurt anyone.
#11 If it’s too long of a text, call. Come on people, the telephone is still alive and well! I know we’re in this era where it’s weird to call people, but it’s actually not. Plus, since no one calls each other anymore, it actually shows the person how much you like them. It’s a pretty big move. And if you need to write an essay to them, it’s easier to call them.
#12 No one-worded answers. If you’re actually interested in them, why would you reply with just one word? Drop that habit. If someone gives you a proper text message with a question, then answer it. If you think a one-word answer is playing hard to get, it’s not. In reality, it’s annoying. [Read: How to hold your end of a conversation]
#13 Talk about life. No, I don’t mean you need to get all philosophical, but talking about each other’s day and things that happened throughout is a great way to build a connection. This allows both of you to see how you live your lives and that brings out curiosity.
[Read: 15 unwritten texting rules you must remember
Now that you know how to keep a text conversation going, you have no excuse to not put these pointers into use. Try some of these out to keep the conversation lively and fun.