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I need something in my life that brings me joy. Something to motivate and inspire me,something to lift me up and let me stretch my wings and fly. But perhaps I should say someone rather than something -I’m one of those people that whilst I’m happy to be alone, I only feel pleasure when it comes from an external source. I can’t love myself unless I am loved by another. I love and care about my partner but we aren’t connecting and certainly aren’t inspiring one another, rather making each other miserable.
But what is it that I want.
Do I want a relationship? a friendship? a filthy sexual fantasy? a muse? or something else I’ve not yet thought of.
I want to feel some joy and I want to feel wanted.
There’s a part of me that wants a sub. Someone who loves